The year that was

Milestones in 2011

Many things I did this year are ‘something I did for the first time’.

It has been a very busy, satisfying fulfilling year - lots of travelling and meeting new people and learning, making decisions on my own and following it through.

Again a big shift in direction in my life.

Did only 21 blogs this year – not impressive - compared to 49 last year. It is because I was too busy doing so many new things that kept my mind occupied.

January
· Went to Bangalore to attend Kalyani – SK’s 80^th birthday
· Stayed overnight with my sister Kala at Pyramid valley, near Bangalore and also attended a talk by Dalai Lama.

February
· Went to Bombay for a week to attend my brother Sridhar’s 60^th birthday
March
· Had a surgery – total removal of thyroid. Smooth recovery. Highlight of it was that my brother Santhanam was with me in the hospital all throughout and l could spend a great 4 days with him
April
· Had a great week-long trip to Shillong with Sridhar, Daya and Neha. The trip was great and so perfect. The highlight of the trip was my son Rajan from Australia, joined us in Calcutta and made it the best holiday.
· Read Robin Shama’s book on Leadership in the Officers’ Mess in Shillong that motivated me and gave me courage to do so many things during the year
May
· Went to Mumbai to attend my cousin Saroja’s grandson’s poonal.
· In Mumbai, had a get-together with Sridhar’s friends to discuss our concept of a Dream Home
· 5^th May – 1^st trip to Coimbatore looking for a retirement home to live in and to buy land to built Dream Homes for retired family members and friends. Identified a good Home I can stay in
· On Narasimha Jayanthi, went to Sholingar temple, something I have wanted to do for a long time, but was not brave enough to venture into climbing 1300 steps. Robin Sharma motivated me to do it.
June

· 2^nd trip to Coimbatore to look
for land with a Real Estate agent (contacted from the net). Was able to identify a good location. Also went to Erode to attend URC Mr. Devarajan’s son’s wedding.

· Spend a week in Mumbai, in honour of my nephew Sujan’s visit from Australia

July
· 3^rd trip to Kovai to finalise buying a property; negotiated with the land-owner and sealed the deal
August
· Went to Kodaikanal with Sridhar and Kala and visited Daya’s mother in Dindukal.
· My friend Ramraj bought me a laptop
· Went for a weekend retreat to JK foundation in Chennai; Enjoyed the experience
September

· 4^th trip to Coimbatore to verify the documents with the help of a lawyer and to get clarity on the payment details

· 5^th trip to Coimbatore on Sep 12 – Registered the land. Had a wonderful weekend with Kala and Sridhar

· Published the 60^th issue of the in-house magazine of The Journey

· Retired after more than 15 years of service in TCL

October

· Finished compiling TCT’s annual report and got it printed.

· Went up the Anjaneya hill in Sholingar to worship Anjaneya, to complete the pilgrimage, which I did in May

· I turned 70. Had three birthdays – two as per the Tamil calendar / star, one on 2^nd Oct and and another on 16^th Oct. and one as per the English calendar on 10^th Oct. Didn’t know about the 2^nd; on 10^th I was busy the whole day that I could do nothing more than wear a new saree. On my friend Dhanam reminding of my third chance, I celebrated my birthday on 16^th at the Thiruvallikeni Parthasarathy temple, inviting all the family members and friends to have the sakkarai pongal prasadam. It was also to say good bye to all of them before moving to Coimbatore. It was lovely.

· Went to Coimbatore on a four-day trip by car with Ramraj and family. It was a wonderful trip.

· Enjoyed the get-together of family members at Ranipet as a send off for me.
November

· Moved to Coimbatore to live in Aarogya Kudumbam. This move changed my life style completely. I feel relaxed and in a holiday mood all the time. I feel I have come to my final resting place

December

Had so many new experiences, met so many new people. Had the first meeting with an architect to design our dream home. Mr.Devarajan of URC will be guiding the team to do this project.

What I miss the most

What I miss the most after my retirement is the pleasure of Sunday afternoon nap.

Working six-days a week, I would look forward to the Sunday, right from Friday morning, especially in the last two years.

After having a heavy meal of stuffed parathas, rasedar and mixed vegetable raita, and a desert of kheer, it is a real treat to have an hour of solid, deep sleep. (can’t really call it a nap)

Now having the luxury of the freedom to have a nap anytime during the day, I don’t even know when Sunday comes along. The charm of having a Sunday afternoon nap is gone.

Live in the moment

The question people asked me when they heard I am retiring is, “What would you be doing?”
The answer was, “I have no idea”, and couple of months after my retirement the answer is still the same. I am too busy learning to live a new way of life; no time to ponder over ‘what would I do’.

I also decided to move into a retirement home. I am the first person in our family to do that. It is not the done thing even in the circle I move. People wonder what is the matter with her. Some people even felt sad for me and felt they have to console me. Why poor Jaya is moving to an old people’s home in an unfamiliar city, where she knows nobody? What would she do if she gets sick, with no family around to look after her?

It is my conscious choice. About six months ago when I came across a place I would like to live in I made the decision on the spot without even questioning what I am getting myself into. I have plunged into it with an open mind and almost a fearless innocence of a child.

Today it is exactly one month since I moved into a retirement home. I enjoy and love every aspect of my new phase of life. I do not dwell on the past or dream of happiness somewhere else or worry about an unknown future. Infact even the immediate past seem a lifetime away. I feel I have come home. I feel safe and comfortably taken care of.

Couple of days ago, in the early morning, looking at the thickly wooded mountains surrounding me on three sides, I felt that these thousands of years old mountains knew all along that I would be coming here at this time, after completing all that I had to do and experience in my life.
I wake up each morning knowing fully well that I and I alone is responsible for my happiness and well-being and to make my day more meaningful. I feel I am the lucky one who could do this, be happy and enjoy life to the fullest.

I do some of my regular activities with more vigour and enthusiasm – getting up as usual at 4.30 a.m. – meditating longer and going for my morning walk, proudly dressed in salwar-kameez and sneakers.

I have given up some of my old habits – like listening to religious discourses in the morning on TV, as it didn’t fit in with my schedule here. I would much rather spend more time outside, picking parijatham flowers from the garden and looking at the early morning red sky in the east and the low hanging clouds over the mountains.

I have been doing so many things for the first time. I am bold enough to take a bus to the city, do not mind even if I have to stand all the way. I have been exploring my neighbourhood and getting to know all kinds of people. The type of people I interact with or the activities I indulge in are not exactly what I am used to. But then I didn’t come here to continue with what I have been doing. I am open to any new experience. But I am still time bound, systematic and disciplined.

I am flexible. I make use of / enjoy / take advantage of the facilities / opportunities available or that presents itself. The experience and knowledge I have gained over the years helps me to deal with people and situations with utmost confidence that it surprises me.

Sitting in my front porch after dark, listening to the silence, I feel at peace - nothing to achieve, no need to prove anything, nobody to compete with – just have to only be.

Someone to admire

Someone to admire

She is diplomatic; she is outspoken.
She has self-confidence; she has doubts.
She is sure of herself; she has conflicts.
She is calm and collected; she has emotional outbursts.
She is not professionally qualified; she is smart enough to learn anything.
She has lived and travelled around the world; she still has her originality.
She is comfortable living in a city in US or a small rural town in India.
She makes friends easily; she enjoys her own company.
She is open and transparent; she is mysterious and reserved.
She reads books by Ayn Rand or Mills and Boons series with ease.
She watches feel good movies.
She is charged with energy; she is relaxed.
She sets her standards high; she accepts her limitations.
She loves to meet people; she makes time for solitude.
She is fit and healthy; it's her way of life.
She could afford to have anything in life; she lives a simple life.
She is loving; she is detached.
She is bold; she is shy and timid.
She has a modern outlook; she is conservative.
She could relate to any kind of people; she has friends in high places.
She trusts people; she takes time to bond.
She appreciates all good things in life; she has few possessions.
She is organized, disciplined, and creative.
She does everyday things with commitment and involvement.
She can take up challenges; she can sit back and just watch.

She has many admirers. Lots of people think she is special, and wish they could be like her and have told her so. I would do it too, if she wasn’t me.

Last month my son Rajan wrote in face book – “Met a lady last night who runs a film school in Kibera - on the outskirts of Nairobi, one of the world's largest slums. There are people in the world doing remarkable things. Why isn't he one of them?”

For which his friend David Simon replied – “good question. You DO do amazing things rajan, perhaps not the kind of amazing thing you want to be doing! you might be under-estimating your amazing-ness too!”

And his cousin Prathamesh Karkal said – “Well I show off to my friends and colleagues that my cousin works in the PM's office! You are already doing something remarkable Rajan!”

That's what made me think about myself.