The 'Sorry' speech

Felt so sad to see former Prime Minister of Australia Mr.Kevin Rudd sitting on the backbench during the House of Representatives question time at Parliament House in Canberra.

Kevin Rudd's ‘sorry' speech in Parliament in 2008, addressing the indigenous people of Australia, for the ‘stolen generation’ is the best speech I have ever heard.

I know he had a good speech writer, but i felt he said it with feeling.
I read it one more time today.
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2008/02/13/1202760379056.html
I respect him just for that one action.

கடி ஜோக்ஸ்

எனக்கு கடி ஜோக்ஸ் பிடிக்கும். சிலரது மூளை எப்படி இது போல செயல் படுகிறது என்று ஆச்சரிய படுவேன். உதாரணத்திற்கு இதோ சில -

தயிர் ஏன் வெள்ளையாய் இருக்கு?
தோய்கிறதாலே!

காகம் ஏன் தண்ணீரில் மூழ்குவதில்லை?
அது கரையுமே!

குற்றாலம் அருவியை பற்றிய செய்தி எதையும் நம்பாதே.
ஏன் அப்படி?
அது பால்ஸ் நியூஸ் ஆச்சே!!

எனக்கும் தான் தயிர் தோய்க்கவேண்டும், காகம் கரையும், குற்றாலம் பால்ஸ் என்று தெரியும், ஆனால் என்னால் இப்படி ஒரு கடி ஜோக் கூட உருவாக்க முடியவில்லையே. இதற்கும் 3 - D pictures பார்க்க கற்றுக்கொள்வது போல பழகிக்கொள்ளவேண்டுமோ?

Happiness is doing a job well

Happiness is doing a job well

“I always strive to complete a job given to me in a way that satisfies me. The word ‘happiness’ in relation to completing a job to my satisfaction to date had never crossed my mind, but you have helped me find this word ‘Happiness’ even whilst doing a ‘routine’ or ‘mundane’ job and I am glad you helped me find it.”

– This is what our Company Secretary Rita Malgaonkar wrote in response to my statement “Happiness is doing a job well”.

This comment by Rita made me think this morning. With me there is nothing like a ‘mundane’, ‘routine’ job and as for us I know I do not have a different standard for the so-called ‘mundane’, ‘routine’ job.

If ‘mundane’, ‘routine’ job means the repetitive work of the everyday activity of making the bed, washing dishes & cloths, cleaning the house and tidying the cupboards, I do have my own standard for doing these too and I follow it meticulously for my own satisfaction.

I have observed the ways of doing various activities of people in my life, like my parents, family, friends and so many people I come across and developed a working style all of my own.

(Everyday I remember my sister Kala, while folding my petticoat and my mother when I put away my clothes in the cupboard. When I put off doing the routine, I often think of my neighbour in Scottsdale Mrs. Lethy (1970 – 77) who maintained her garden patch next to our common picket fence so meticulously that it never looked as if it needed tending. I haven’t forgotten my friend Mrs. Baliga, of a long long time ago (1962 - 64), who used to make Poli, chakli and laddu so perfectly, evenly shaped.)

For me the adage ‘if a job has to be done, it has to be done well’ holds true for whatever I do. If I take up a job I can’t do it with an attitude that this much attention to details is enough for this job.

This might create a certain amount of tension and stress in me. I can live with it but not the unhappy feeling and dissatisfaction of having done a shoddy job.

I know I have to work on this aspect of me to be equipoised after the event. Though it is acceptable to be happy when the result turns out good and accept it as a reward for efforts put in, I have to learn not to get overly agitated when it doesn’t turn out as expected. I should overcome the feeling that my ‘shortcoming’ is visible for all to see, in my creations.

A satisfying work assignment

A satisfying work assignment

For the past one month, I have been working on our Companies’ Annual Reports.

This job was not assigned to me. I wasn’t asked to do it. Nobody thought it needed to be improved upon. I only heard excuses that ‘Everybody is only doing it this way’ or ‘This is enough, as it is going to be thrown away’, ‘Don’t want to spend more on it’, ‘ why do you create work for yourself’, etc.

I have been talking about it for the past two years. I felt the very basic way we are doing the Company’s Annual Report is not appropriate for a Company of our standing in the business world; we need to project it a bit better to show we are proud of who we are; we need to create an image of quality at this level too. I argued that this is a great medium to show our shareholders that we care and it can be a Brand building activity too.

This year, with self-motivation, I gingerly started to do it for Thirumalai. Worked on a theme and got the cover page designed with the help of my friend Ramanan of Ram Creative Chambers. I was asked to do for Ultramarine too as the Company is completing 50 years since inception. Identifying a theme and the cover design to mean what we want to project was challenging, but feel so happy that it has come out well.

There is very little I can do with the content of the Report, and general format as it is all done in the prescribed format as per statutory requirement.

I started mainly on the layout and some standardizing. There again I was not sure I can change the way they have said like in ‘As on’, ‘As at’, ‘The period ended’, ‘The year ended’ etc. to mean the same thing. These and few others should have been corrected in the Accounts stage itself. People working year in and year out in these do not notice anything odd in these. I did a whole lot of corrections – mostly very minor, some insignificant that it will not mater at all in the final analysis. I was against using ALL CAPS.

Since Ultramarine’s AGM is earlier than Thirumalai’s I worked last weekend on UPL's report. On Sunday afternoon after completing the work, I felt very happy and very proud of myself. With confidence in my capability I am ready to do Thirumalai’s report.

I always remember this when I do any job - A man was doing a sculpture of Ganesha to be placed on top of the Gopuram in a temple. He was working so meticulously to make the back of the image so perfectly smooth. A person watching him asked, why he is spending so much time doing the thing that is not going to be seen by anybody. The man replied I know if I haven’t done a good job of it.

It is not who would notice or who cares - Happiness is doing a job well.

Just driving to work

Just driving to work

I drive very little. Everyday it is just the 10-minute drive to work and back, and on Sundays it to the weekly vegetable market.

The distance to work is not a 10-minute drive, but it takes 10 minutes for me to reach the factory. It is only a two-lane highway. The first hurdle is getting into the main road from the quarters where I live. At 8.20 a.m. it is the busiest time as the school, college and factory buses all ply at this time. And the office goers in two-wheelers also race against time to reach their work place before 8.30.

We have our Vedavalli Vidyalaya school bus stop on the left of the driveway. On the right most of the time there would be a lorry parked of a transport company next door, blocking my view of the on-coming traffic from that side. On both sides of the driveway children, parents and teachers wait for the school bus to arrive. Some parents come to drop their children by two-wheelers and cars and stop right in front of the driveway.

The entry to the road from the driveway is at a slight elevation. Getting up and waiting for a clearance in the road is the first step. And then I look on all the sides for the right opportunity to enter into the road. Most of the time I would wonder did I see that cycle coming, or the person about to cross the road? Would the two-wheeler slow down enough for me to make it across the road?

After about 200 meters there is a T-junction to the right. Just at the junction there are public transport bus stops on either side of the road. Pedestrians – young, old, disabled - would be crossing where there is no such thing as a pedestrian crossing and the pedestrians have no right of way. There would also be a cow, a calf and few stray dogs crossing with the cars, two-wheelers and cyclist entering the main road from the T-junction, where everybody has the ‘Right of way’!! You can imagine the confusion.

From both the sides drivers try to use the available space between the parked buses and the aggressive ones, who have their headlights on usually push through. This practise of turning the headlights on during the day is to indicate to the road user that 'I am going to use your side of the road, you better move away', is unique to India. And the two-wheelers, unafraid, over take very close to me on the right and left.

The famous Mario Miranda, the cartoonist of the Illustrated Weekly of India would be able to do this junction with full satisfaction.

After I get through this hurdle, and drive further with the vans (taking the girls to work in the shoe companies) chasing me with their incessant ‘give way, give way, I am in a hurry’ horn, within the next 500 meters, is the most dangerous intersection. The main road turns left. But I have to take the straight road, cutting across the main road traffic.

Again there are public transport bus stops on either side of the road just at that junction. Sometimes there is absolutely no visibility of the oncoming vehicles. When I wait, others over take me on either side. After that when I cautiously cross, avoiding the people alighting from the bus crossing the road diagonally, maneuvering the sudden dip in the road between the main road and the service road (the main road gets more topping and hence at a higher level) go over the four speed breakers (they are for slowing down the vehicles entering the highway) and then I shift to 3rd gear and relax a little bit letting whoever wants to overtake me.

Today I was pretty relaxed driving down to work and was able to just observe all these and accept it as a way of life in India. The meditation I have been practicing for the past couple of months really helps.

வரம் தா இறைவா

வரம் தா இறைவா

காலை என்னை எழுப்பும் அலார கடிகாரமாய் பறவைகள் ஒருசேர எழுப்பும் கீதங்கள்

எழுந்ததும் பலகணி கதவை திறக்கையில் என்னை ஸ்பரிசிக்கும் காற்று

கடவுள் முன் ஏற்றிய குத்துவிளக்கின் முத்துப்போன்ற சுடர்

அமர்ந்து தியானிக்கும் போது ஏற்படும் அமைதி

வீரியத்தை கட்டுப்படுத்த போல சுற்றி வட்டமிட்ட இளம் காலை சூரியன்

எங்கிருந்தோ காற்றில் கலந்து வரும் ஜாதி மல்லிகை அல்லது பாரிஜாதப்பூ வாசம்

எதேச்சையாய் சில நேரங்களில் கண்ணில் படும் கிளி அல்லது மீன்கொத்தி பறவை

வாலை மேலே தூக்கிக்கொண்டு ஏதோ சொல்ல வருவது போல கிட்ட வந்து நின்று பார்த்துவிட்டு திரும்பிப்போகும் அணில்

வாசலில் பளிச்சென்று கச்சிதமாக அமைந்த அன்றைய சிறு கோலம்

தட்டில் அலங்கரித்து கடவுள் முன் வைத்த அன்று குவளை போல மலர்ந்த சிவந்த குல்மோகர் பூக்கள்

வாத்சல்யமும் அன்பும் கனிவும் குழைத்து கலந்த கன்றுக்குட்டியின் கண்கள்

எல்லாவிதமான சுமுகமான உறவுமுறைகளிலும் வெளிப்படும் அன்யோன்யம்

சுட்டெரிக்கும் வெய்யிலில் காற்று வீச சல சலக்கும் அரசமரத்து இலைகள்

சுருள் சுருளாய் கொத்துக்கொத்தாய் இலைகளுடன் பறந்து விரிந்து நிழல் தர நிற்கும் வேப்ப மரம்

எங்கும் நீலமாய் அல்லது சிறு சிறு பஞ்சுப்பொதி போன்ற மேக கூட்டமுடன் அல்லது மழை பொழிய தயாராகும் கருத்த மேகங்களுடனான வானம்

ஆரஞ்சு வண்ணத்தில் பார்த்துகொண்டே இருக்கத்தூண்டும் மெதுவாய் கீழ்வானத்தில் அஸ்தமிக்கும் சூரியன்

கூட்டம் கூட்டமாக வீடு நோக்கி பறந்து செல்லும் மாலை நேரத்து பறவைகள்

இரவில் மொட்டை மாடியில் மல்லாந்து படுக்கையில் தெரியும் தினம் தினம் உருமாரி வரும் நிலா

ஒரே சீராக அழகாக, கவிதையாய் ஒருமித்து செல்லும் என் சிந்தனை

இவைகளை பார்த்து, ரசித்து, உணரும்போது நான் அனுபவிக்கும் இன்பம், ஆனந்தம், உவகை, உத்வேகம் இவை எல்லாம் என்னுள்ளிலிருந்து தான் வந்தது என்பதை மறவாதிருக்க வரம் தா இறைவா.

Playing with words

மங்கையர் மலரில் இந்த ஜோக் படித்தேன். மிகவும் ரசித்தேன். எழுதியவரின் சாமர்த்தியத்தை வெகுவாக பாராட்ட முடிந்தது. எனக்கும் இப்படி எழுத வேண்டும் போல ரொம்ப ஆசையாக இருக்கிறது

மனைவி - உங்கள் அம்மா சொல்வதை கேளுங்கள்.
கணவன் - உனக்கு கோபம் வராதா?
மனைவி - அம்மா சொல்வதை கேளுங்கள், நான் சொல்வதை செய்யுங்கள்.

Practicing a day of silence

Practicing a Day of Silence
For me the mechanics of practicing silence is easy, as I live alone and nobody visits me on a regular basis, expect a servant lady. I do not get many phone calls either. I am able to easily resist picking up the phone when it rings occasionally. I am completely isolated.

But it is quite obvious that the silence of ‘non-thinking’ and quieting of the chattering mind is an entirely different process all together unconnected with not talking.

Not talking, and being in the habit of having my morning - evening walks up in the terrace gives me lot of time to live with myself and follow my thoughts. That has really brought some awareness about my unique way of thinking. I have discovered the answers to some of the dilemma I have been perplexed with. Listening silently to my own heart, my mind has quitened down and I am comfortable with my thoughts!!

As I have been out of the habit of cooking for a number of years, on the days of being by myself, I am able to get by (actually I enjoy) eating fruits, milk and bread (sometimes with cheese). This gives rest to my digestive system too. Avoiding watching TV or reading anything heavy gives me plenty of time to do nothing. Even though I can sleep for as long as I like, the sleeping pattern developed over the years doesn’t change. Not doing anything I am not tired. Not having a full meal I don’t get that drowsy feeling I get on the Sunday after lunch. So the time drags. The day seems too long.

But I have learnt to just be. I am not feeling I have to do something. Not pressed for time I am able to meditate in a relaxed way. I have started enjoying the process and look forward to it each time. After the morning meditation, when I go up to the terrace with a cup of coffee, when it is just getting a little light in the east, I feel so happy and contented, as if there is nothing more to be had in life.

Though I have always enjoyed talking, after practicing silence for 5 Saturdays, I feel very comfortable not talking; now I understand I do not have to talk so much. I need to extend this awareness to other times when I am with people!!

As the next step, I plan to be consciously silent for a while each day, while everyone else around me carries on with their conversation.

I, Me and Myself

I, Me and Myself

Yesterday when I got a reply for one of my mails, I was disappointed that the person hasn’t understood what I had written in my mail.

I started replying to that mail with, “From your response to my mail I feel you haven’t understood”. Then I realized my mistake and rephrased it to “I feel I haven't made myself clear”. I felt happy putting it that way, taking the responsibility for the missed communication.

Last week when Sridhar and I went out for dinner with Ramraj, I was annoyed that the person serving us wasn’t cheerful and didn’t seem very enthusiastic when he was taking the order. Neither Ramraj nor Sridhar noticed anything wrong. As usual I did comment on it to his face. Ramraj pointed out that the poor boy might have had a bad day already. I never looked at it from that angle. It was my expectation that a person in the service industry should have the right attitude to do the job well. Later I told the boy the food was good.

Last month when I confronted somebody in an agitated state of mind on an issue that emotionally affected me deeply, that person mistook the gist of it as an accusation of an entirely different nature and felt he had to defend himself.

It was my clear conscience that made me realize and accept how the person could have received it. It was easy for me to say, “Forgive me. I didn't mean to come through that way. It was not my intension. I am sorry”.

All these are different aspects of my behaviour under different circumstances. Knowing and recognizing and being aware that in any situation it is my expectation that is causing the emotional disturbance and correcting it right away without hesitation, makes me feel good about myself. Not feeling guilty for my behaviour makes me the master of myself, with the feeling that I am OK.